Another Night!

Paul Reubens In 'Pee-Wee's Big Adventure'

It was another cold and dreary afternoon.  As I pulled into work,  I noticed his Harley. The one-legged biker was back! Okay I exaggerate, it’s a Harley in his mind, it actually resembled Pee-wee Herman’s bicycle.

In the previous two nights, Peg-leg, as the locals dubbed him, was involved in two fights: the first in which he was sitting on the deck and flicked a lit cigarette into the face of passing pedestrian. I understand this didn’t end well for Peg-leg.  The next night he gets in a fight in the sand volleyball court, his leg fell off and a customer grabbed it and threatened to beat him with it.  Peg-leg was earning a reputation.

Knowing this, I was going to have my opportunity to have a word with the burgeoning legend.  Little did I know, I was entering a hornet’s nest.  Later I learned Peg-leg was involved in another confrontation where he took his leg off and threw it at someone, who in turn took the leg and ran outside waving the leg and shouting, “I got a leg up on you, expletive expletive!”  I don’t want to give the wrong impression, the bar is a dive, one with unique character; but it isn’t a rough and tumble place, but get the locals wound up and its game on.

Peg-leg was sitting calmly at the bar,  patrons were scattered around the bar, none to close, all eying him. Behind the

How Peg-leg sees himself.
How Peg-leg sees himself.

bar the barmaid was almost in tears. “We need to talk,” I said to peg-leg.  Smiles washed over the customers face. They knew entertainment was in store.  I get animated in these situations and one never knows what will come out of my mouth. It’s always entertaining.

After a little discourse, I kicked the guy out and he refused to leave.   I dumped his beer. We have choice words for each other and I called the cops. This is were I’m proud of the patrons. He tried to bait anyone and everyone into hitting him so he could file a police report.  No one did.  I was playing the same game with him, the sea of insults was great, if you like that sort of stuff. The customers enjoyed the show and it boosted sales.

He left when no one would played his game, and that the cops were actually on the way – this is rural Montana and it  takes  time.

Peg-leg, I can’t say that I’m gonna miss you, but thanks, over the course of three days you became legend.

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